There are many shows on TV right now which I would consider manly. The Deadliest Warrior is obviously one of them, The Man Show is still on air, there’s Manswers, Mantracker, UFC, DEA… Well pretty much anything on Spike.

For a show to be considered manly, there are essential elements which need to be included. These are: violence, science, hot women, destruction of any kind, comedy and anything which is specifically designed for men. Obviously whichever shows contain the most of these are going to be the better shows.

There is an exception to the rule, though. A show can be manly and only encorporate one or two or these elements, they just need to go above and beyond. The Saw and Hostel movies are a good example of this. They take violence to a near snuff film level. By filling the male gore meter right to the brim, it takes the mind off the other elements and makes him focus on the one manly aspect.

On such TV show that is doing an excellent job is one called Machines of Malice. Machines of Malice does not have any gore, naked girls, a significant amount of comedy or amazing feats of manliness, yet it is still one of the manliest shows on television today. How is this so? It’s because instead of focusing on one area of man interest, it has taken parts of all of them. Hell you even learn a bit about history while watching.

Machines of Malice is a fairly simple show. They take the most ruthless killing torture devices that men has ever designed and showcase them, a few per episode. They don’t show anything gruesome, really, but they go into great detail about how they work and they also demonstrate using animal cacasses, dummies, etc. As they tell you about these machines, you can almost feel them. They make you really think back to what someone in one of these machines must have felt like.

Some of the devices on the show you will recognize and are a bit boring, for instance: the guillotine and the electric chair, but there are some devices that were used that would have been beyond painful. Here is my favourite device they’ve covered that I didn’t previous know of.:

The Brazen Bull

The Brazen Bull was a fairly simple concept, with a psychotic twist. Designed by Perillos of Athens, a brass founder, the bull was designed to Phalaris, the king’s specifications. The bull was made of bronze and was hollow. On the bull’s back was a door and lock. The victim was placed inside, the door closed and a fire was lit beneath the bull’s stomache. Bronze is an excellent conductor; therefore, it took no time to hear the victim begin to scream in pain. This is where that sick twist comes into play. At the snout of the bull was a series of tubes, much like a horn. These horns transformed the victims screams into what sounded like an enraged bull. Upon completion of the first bull, Phalaris was curious to hear the sound the bull would make. He asked Perillos to climb inside and blow through the horn as a demonstration. The second Perillos was inside, the door was locked and the fire was lit.

Check out the show. It’s on Discovery Channel. It’s manlier than hell and well worth your time. Here’s some clips of previous shows: